Reynard_T_Fox: When merely riding the coattails isn't enough for you anymore.	Buffoon: "Fuckin' showoffs!" "Let it go, Margaret." "All, I'm saying is this... Who builds a brick high-rise addition to a mobile home?"	GersonK: and NBC are proud to present CSI: SUV: EI: EIO
SilentFilmStar: Telepathic tracking of criminals was a new concept, but Sgt. Stevens liked how pants became optional.	Jazzsoda: That special plastic sleeve will help Delmar retain his value as a collectable for years to come.	Agent_Moldy: He pretended not to care, but deep down, Gerald was miffed that he lost at Musical Ashtrays.
HanoverF: "Tonight on Monster Chiller Spoiler Theater, It's a cookbook, enjoy the show."	Agent_Moldy: Go ahead and trip over that ottoman. You know you want to.	Jazzsoda: John Wayne Spacey always lures 'em in with the trippy Twilight Zone door defying perspective in his basement, just enough to get 'em close to his motorized pickaxe.
Hippie: Dad, you're feet are hurting me! Why do you have to wear cleats? *You wanted a summer job and I needed a footstool, Teddy. First lesson for a working man: Never complain.	GuloGulo: Bill was so used to punching people, he didn't even notice that he was doing it anymore.	Hippie: This fucking sucks. You know this billboard didn't insult Jimmy Two-Times! *Don't matter. Jimmy's a made guy. If he even thinks the billboard insulted him, it's wormfood!
Jazzsoda: Jill attempts to get a tricorder reading on her possibly-dead husband, but he's just passed out drunk and she's mistaken PEZ for futuristic technology yet again.	Generik: "Yep... just like I like my men... lukewarm, bitter and full of beans..."	Hippie: Nothing helped put the Bruiser in the mood to fight more than having his dad in the corner reminding him how disappointed he was with him.
Reynard_T_Fox: "Look, never mind whose fault it is, we're gonna drown in pudding if we don't think fast!"	HanoverF: Tonights main event Joe "Nipple Socker" Lapalmo Versus Gentleman Jim "Earstroker" Gaffagin	Jazzsoda: Most secret admirers like to keep their distance, but Dan's curiosity about how his poems were received was just too intense.
Hippie: Dressing a pear in a suit isn't going to fool people into thinking it's a person. Yeah, the face you drew is exceptional, just not quite believable.	Reynard_T_Fox: "You know, we say it a lot to people, but this time I seriously think it *would* be a shame if something were to happen to this place." "Shut up, Lou."	Jazzsoda: Depressed and heavily medicated, even Dan's titty twisters had become lackluster and unfocused.
Generik: In a show of solidarity with his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, Wendell nails his hand to the radiator.	Hippie: I say he's a stripper! *I think he's a pirate! *Ar, you're both right, ladies! I be Cap'n Thirdleg, the Strippin' Pirate! *I say we castrate him. *I say we behead him.	keogh: They wanted to retire old Gus, but recent developments in the anti-discrimination laws made it impossible to even check to see if he was dead.
Seltaeb: "We still can't find your mouthpiece, so just use my daughter's retainer. Don't mind the sunflower seeds."	Reynard_T_Fox: If things ever got out of hand, they'd call in that mime to put an invisible wall in between the two fighters.	Seltaeb: I gotta admit, the judge installing the new "dartboard of justice" behind him made presiding over cases much easier and quicker for him!
Reynard_T_Fox: Nothing livens up a lazy afternoon like a spectacular high dive into a flower vase.	Generik: presents "Where to Stow Your Feline Companion."	Seltaeb: "Rainy day women number twelve and thirty... one? No..."
HanoverF: Evil Knieval's attepmt to Pole Vault over an Apollo rocket didn't end well... for the Rocket! Evil Rules!!!	Hippie: Gerson's foray into Screengrab Fold-Ins was inventive, and kind of funny. But I ruined the shit out of my monitor, and for what? It just makes one blue and red car!	HanoverF: Citing our nations addiction to oil, Bush pushes research for a Christine hobo blood fueled car
Hippie: Check out how cool our lead singer is! She dresses all in black and only sings in German! She also fired all of the band and only plays in my grandma's hallway. But you gotta admit, cool as fuck!	Reynard_T_Fox: Jack was a human beat box, and the entire Air Force had to know it.	Hippie: Who says there's no way to dress up a cake for the funeral of a married couple killed at the same time? Hippie finds a way!
Jazzsoda: Any time somebody says "Come on in, pull up a lap," I flash back to childhood visits to grandpa's house, and puke up pistachios, no matter what I've been eating.	Hippie: The most embarrassing part about peeing off the side of the boat was trying to explain to the rest of the guys why his dick was a canoe.	Reynard_T_Fox: That's when I realized that the ghost of Buddy Ebsen was haunting my toaster.
Jazzsoda: "Come on, Herve, into the trunk!" "De plane, boss!" "If I could afford plane tickets, I wouldn't be sneaking your ass into Mexico in the trunk, now would I?"	Hippie: I told you we wouldn't get off the ground, Marvin! *You weren't opening and closing the doors fast enough, jackass! On my side I got some lift!	Seltaeb: Wouldn't you know it? I'm all out of question wiper fluid!
Seltaeb: Unfortunately, she was more excited about the crossword puzzle underneath than the necklace. That's what you get for marrying Marilyn vos Savant.	Reynard_T_Fox: Momma never told them that their real father was a grandfather clock...it was better this way.	Jazzsoda: "Eat shit, Rachel!" "Oh yeah, let's see how you smile through a mouth fulla busted teeth, eh Chandler?" "Would you pussies shut up in there? I'm punching little kids in here!"
Jazzsoda: "Moooom! These Rice Krispies sure act a lot like a bowl full of live aphids!" "Hush it, Jenny! Or do you want to eat the leaf out of our hot dog table again?"	Seltaeb: My money's on the lightpost. Now unpause it.	Reynard_T_Fox: At last...superconducting butter! Sure it's 200 degrees below zero and thus kinda hard to spread, but you don't need to clean the dish anymore!

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