 Jazzsoda: I hate it when my boss calls me into his office for a "chat" and he's already got the crucifix primed and ready. |
 AgentQ: Hank is the only guy in town who eats like Brundlefly eats. |
 Hippie: I said "screw the Earth." And I mean "screw the Earth." |
 Generik: Before Diebold voting machines, it took a huge team of Republican grandmothers working feverishly after every election to ensure the proper outcome was achieved. |
 Jazzsoda: *gaw-chomp-chomp* "You got something you want to share with the rest of the group, Sharkey?" *glug-glug-chomp* "Well it's a fine time to bring that up, we've been in production for three weeks!" |
 SilentFilmStar: Wearing the Burger Queen crown into the OR seemed excessive, but Barb insisted they remember who was REALLY in charge. |
 Hippie: Tho... Juth becuth I had a sthtroke, the bank won't approof my bank loan? |
 Meldrick: Electrified lemons? So Donovan was wrong after all. |
 Shifter: "OK, Patterson, take this down: Dot." "Dot." "Dash." "Dash." "Dot." "Dot." "Dot." "Dot..." |
 AgentQ: Frank's autopsy produced startling results. |
 Jazzsoda: I always get stuck with the bullshit homemade tokens when I join a game of Life late. |
 Hippie: Pull it back... crank it back... steady... goddammit, Coyote, how is it I let you talk me into these things? ...That goddamn bird better taste de-fuckin'-licious... |
 AgentQ: The fourth little piggie's "house made of flesh" failed the Bad Wolf Test as well. |
 Jazzsoda: Well fuck me! This cookie ain't gonna eat itself!" "Actually dad, it will if... oh, nevermind. No batteries." |
 Reynard_T_Fox: The Tuppership survived the launch, but unfortunately went through explosive deburping on re-entry. |
 Jazzsoda: The worst part about sleep-driving is when you wake up at the top of an unfinished sky-scraper, with no change for the toll stairs. |
 Hippie: An insidious future, where shakes, diet drinks, and finger paints watch humans battle to the death in the colisseum! |
 Reynard_T_Fox: The Archolith didn't evolve any races to new heights of ingenuity, but it did create some wicked cool fruit fly mutations. |
 AgentQ: No sooner did everyone sit down for the picnic than the entire event was interrupted by the scene transition from Superfriends. |
 Reynard_T_Fox: Yeah, so what if the world's last Truffula tree is under glass at the Luxor. |
 Hippie: Tonight on "24"... Jack Bauer is ordered by the forman to get steel-toed boots, while Natalie Wood just glances over the side for a second... and Earl's sand trampoline isn't going that well. |
 Shifter: Hurry up, son, them baby teeth ain't gonna slather *themselves* with peanut butter! |
 AgentQ: The genie in the bottle is known to grant any three wishes. The genie in the bucket is only capable of dull menial tasks. |
 Shifter: Sometimes, Betty just liked to kick back with a good book and the trapped souls of her victims. |
 Hippie: Hi, kids! It's me--Mr. Know-It-All! *If you know it all, why are you living in a double-wide? *.... You know what? Fuck you, kids. Figure out how pencils are made your own damn self. |
 Reynard_T_Fox: "See this? This is a hundred smackers, now sing us all of Abba's greatest hits!" "*deep sigh*" |
 Hippie: We're holding this outside? I'm telling you, Roy, putting our money in Hobos, Inc. was a major fuck-up. |