 Generik: "Have you let Jesus into your heart lately?" "My heart?!? Bastard asked me last week to take him in my ass!" |  AgentQ: "Jesus?" "Yes, my son?" "Where are we?" "We are in the future, my son." "I didn't know you could time travel, o Lord." "I have an in with the boss, my son." "Ah." "I use it to fuck with history." "Oh." |  Generik: "Well, sure, I asked you to take me in your ass last week. Don't you realize that's the quickest way to your heart? Because ultimately that's where I want to be. In your  AgentQ: "Why must we travel with the dessicated corpse of Whoopi Goldberg, o Lord?" "Because, my son, this dessicated corpse walks and breathes, and is proof of my healing powers. Also, she honors the diversity requirement."  AgentQ: "But how can you be an atheist when I am standing before you?" "Yeah!" "Quiet, my disciple. Please, explain." "Dude, I didn't buy Koresh. Why should I buy you?" "Because, um... where's that dessicated corpse? Whoopi?"  AgentQ: "I stole the Pope's hat! I stole the Pope's hat!" *Jesus tears ass after her*  Generik: "Yeah, kid, we were thinking about updating from that whole 'nailed to a cross' thing. So we're test-marketing this 'crucified by a WWII walkie-talkie to the head.' You like...?"  AgentQ: "I shall call this place New Jerusalem. You see, my son, I have pretty much given up on the old one."  AgentQ: "O Lord, you are a wise and holy ruler, but I fear your attempts to disguise your rapid weight gain may be in vain." "Silence, you dessicated corpse. As I have revived you, so I can return you to the dirt. Got that?"  Jazzsoda: *picks teeth with communicator* "Where could he be? This IS the wall, I'm sure of it. We were to discuss- Could he be tied up? Christ, he's like six, how busy could he be? *scratches FUCK YOU LINUS into wall*  AgentQ: "But Jesus is here, among us, and yet everyone forgets about him when Christmastime comes to Tatooine, and--" "Fuck you, Linus."  Jazzsoda: "But mom, how can you justify taking part in such a spiritually corrupt and crassly commercialized venture as Christmas? "Wonk wonk wonk, wonk wonk." *subtitles: FUCK YOU, LINUS*  AgentQ: "But he's the reason for the season!" "Fuck you, Linus." "Look, say what you will to me, o man, but do not verbally molest this young boy." "There are so many jokes I can--" "I realize what I just said and I apologize." AgentQ: "Look. I never gave birth to you. Which means you're just like Jesus." "Yippee!" "Linus, I have to say, I really hate everything about God's divine plan. I think he created the universe just to dick around with it."  Reynard_T_Fox: "Yes, you too are blessed, hideous, buglike and a Jewish betrayer though you may be." "I don't think I like you, Jesus." "But I love you, dicknosed son."  Reynard_T_Fox: "Blessed is this fine Corinthian leather." "Actually it's the skin of a tauntaun." "What-the-hell-ever."  AgentQ: "What's up, savior? Lookin' for a good time?" "It must be said, dessicated corpse, that I always hung out with the lower elements of society for a damned good reason. Yes, ladies, I am always looking for a good time."  Reynard_T_Fox: .oO(Everyone wants to dance with Jesus, no one wants to dance with me...)  AgentQ: "Now, Jesus, you shall die." "I forgive you." "Thanks, but that won't stop you from dying." "I shall turn the other cheek." "Still gonna kill you." "Um... the nobility of the human spirit--" *fwang* Generik: "Father, forgive them, for they know not that rosé does not go well with loaves and fishes... Well, okay, fine, it does, but you know how I hate that swill. It's too much like white Zinfandel."  Reynard_T_Fox: "I have to go now, my son. I must...take a weekend off for the sins of the world. If I'm not up by ten on Sunday, just throw a rock at my window." |
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