 The_Reyflower: "Don't step on the white tiles!" *leap* "YAAAAAARRRHHH!!" *flesh seared off by hot lava* "Toldya." |  MoldyBreadStuffing: o/It's Lecherous Uncle, it's Lecherous Uncle, it's fun for a girl or boy...o/ |  MeldroastTurkey: Putting notes like 'you're perfectly OK as you are'what's one more going to hurt' in the peanut butter cup wrappers helped boost sales considerably.  MoldyBreadStuffing: o/You're smoking meeee... you're smoking meeee...o/ "Aw dammit, I rolled a James Blunt by mistake."  The_Reyflower: *band of Moking warriors walk by* "Hey! This is discrimination!" *war cries* *mayhem*  echostation: ...she is suddenly confronted by the Ancient Chinese Secret Gang!  JediClone: Burning your bra while it's still on? X-Treme Feminism!  HanovercookedT: Newspaper Fares No Better AgentQuanberrySauce: "Honey! Wait'll you see what I just killed with a rolled-up newspaper!" "Why do you always have to show me the things you kill with a rolled-up newspaper?" "I'm fascinated by death! You knew that!"  AgentQuanberrySauce: Marshmallows start to look strange if you leave them sitting out for too long.  Meldrumstick: Jim thought he was just stealing some garbage can lids. He wasn't hurting anyone. He never suspected he was secretly working for the racoon syndicate.  Jazzsodamnfull: That guy needs a smoother razor for shaving his back.  Generik: "Cold Fish." "Luke Warm." "Try Again." "Weak Sister." "Do You Squat To Pee?" "Man, these 'Test Your Sex Appeal' machines have got a real attitude!"  Jazzsodamfull: Cleaning Dave's socks took some special equipment, not the least of which was the diamond-toothed funk grinder.  GersonK: It's boxload of me!  Jazzsodamnfull: Maytag engineers did custom jobs on the side, including this pulpit-shaped model for priests who need to multitask.  UnReality: "Waiter, your fly's in my soup!"  AgentQuanberrySauce: "Dick?" "How many times have I told you not to call me that in public?" "This counts as public?" "Shut up. And why am I doing your filing? What do you DO here?"  MoldyBreadStuffing: Back in the day, the Chevy Bulldog was all the rage in many a police station.  The_Reyflower: "Thank you all for coming out to the Boiler Room tonight. You're truly a great crowd." "I'm the only one here." "And what a great person you are."  AgentQuanberrySauce: Sunday services proceeded as usual until Father Ghoulish went up to give his homily about how the rite of Communion means that it's okay to dig up graves and consume the flesh of corpses.  turkeogh: "You can? You're sure? Because we've been getting the runaround all night, and there's a lot riding on this. Okay, hang on..." (cups receiver) "They say they got the deep dish!"  The_Reyflower: "And over here is the headquarters of the XX-Men." "Are they like the super-gifted team?" "No, they're just men with breasts. We keep them away from the rest of the students 'cause you know, ick."  JediClone: "Hello, Tess? Cancel that flashback." *screen reverts to one image*  Jazzsodamnfull: ...you naked! That way, they never get nervous on-air. Mind you, it's a full-time job picturing over 20 million listeners naked all at once.  LauraPowers: *Poke. Jiggle* .oO(He's old. I'll let him have his fun.) MoldyBreadStuffing: "Do you believe in the hereafter?" "Of course I do!" "Huh! Then you know what I'm here after!" "A light?" "Uh, yeah. Y'got one?"  HanovercookedT: "Bad Madeline! Look what you did! Not on the carpet! Bad Madeline!"  Jazzsodamnfull: "Hey Frank, you go out with that flautist last night?" "Yep, and I tromboned 'er!" "Damn! That's quite a story! Wish I could trumpet!"  MoldyBreadStuffing: "You told everyone you tromboned me?! I did that as a cymbal of our love and you just go off and tell everyone??? That's it, we're through! And take off that stupid high hat!"  HanovercookedT: "You dance like Astaire." 'You take a punch like a Gabor.' "Huh?" *WHAM*  GersonK: "Suave? Yes. But made for a lady. Or whoever comes through the door next. You don't have to be choosy to be classy."  GodoHell: "Pardon the mess. I'm having the room re-focused."  Jazzsodamnfull: "It's a beautiful painting." "Yes. I think Great Aunt Towelsnap would have liked it."  GodoHell: .o0 Let's see....fake books with booze inside, stash of hash, kiddie porn....dammit! Doesn't anybody friggin' READ in this house anymore?!? 0o.  Jazzsodamnfull: Second time I've had this grab, and I still don't understand how this movie incorporated a motorcycle running over her flipper like that.  Seltaeb: The bubble wrap window is usually replaced every three or four weeks. Birds or boredom.  The_Reyflower: "Yeah, I know. I rode my Harley in today, and it's migration season for Death's Head moths." "And the hat?" "I'm crazy." "Ah."  AgentQuanberrySauce: . o O How come Freddy's tongue never pops out of a phone at ME?  Seltaeb: After retiring from children's books, Waldo went into tech support, thus assuring that people would still have trouble finding him.  AgentQuanberrySauce: "*VIOLENT VOMITING*" "Oh, there she goes again!" *studio audience laughs and applauds* *credits roll*  turkeogh: "What's that? Impropriety on my part down at the patent office? Son, would you like to know what makes this country great?" (>vip-vip< of silencer) "This boy is sick!" (walks off into crowd)  The_Reyflower: "Ladies and gentlemen, behold the head of Neon Noodle. His reign of terror is finally over."  AgentQuanberrySauce: "Play the world's tiniest violin for me, will you? Well, permit me to read the world's tiniest Bible at your world's tiniest funeral service after you die the world's tiniest death, asshole."  turkeogh: The telephone would have been invented much sooner had Bell dismissed chipmunk tuning earlier in the process.  Jazzsodamnfull: *five baby chicks crossing lawn* *SWIIIIPP* *four baby chicks crossing lawn* *SWIIIPP*  turkeogh: "What did you invent?" (presses her breasts to the glass) "How do I invest?"  AgentQuanberrySauce: It was a normal day at Hughston High until Jack opened his locker and found a long-dead cast member from You Can't Do That On Television.  HanovercookedT: Theres a memeber of our barbershop quartet that isn't pulling their weight and I think you all know who I mean... Hank! 'D'oh!' No, the deer stays.  The_Reyflower: Bride of the Guy From Tool's "Sober" Video! Thrill as she plays the harp! *whirrrr* *slicesliceslice* *fingers fall all over the floor*  AgentQuanberrySauce: Club owner and sadist Frank Nederweather discovered that nothing heats up the dance floor like heating up the dance floor.  The_Reyflower: "Hey good lookin'! Giant Urban Sombrero Man will be back to pick you up later!" "I'm never letting you in my convertible again."  Seltaeb: Close-up of one of Richard Nixon's sweat glands.  Seltaeb: *raise* *lower* "OW!" *raise* *lower* "OW!" *raise* "Maybe I should..." *lower* "OW!" |