 Occupant: As much of the movie as Donald Wildmon saw before declaring it blasphemous. |  keogh: "...in which the desire for flesh frankly beats all comers, if I may coin a phrase." |  CrabofDoom: "Oh, Judas, you know I've never met a chocolate cake I didn't like...!"  CrabofDoom: Initiations to Gamma Beta Jesus are brutal, man.  Agent_Moldy: Then, with a hearty, "Whoaaaa, Bundy!" they were off to the Space Needle.  CrabofDoom: the Ice Cream Headache of Christ  Occupant: In ancient times, before laser sighting, assassins had to actually draw a bead on their targets.  keogh: "Dude, why you gotta stereotype people like that? I'm a Moor, so automatically I gotta be carryin'?" "Sorry, I'm Christ, I know all." "Oh. I can hook ya up a dime bag." "Solid. And centurions check the east gate." "Cool.  HanoverF: "Hey Jesus, I'm here to tempt you. So wanna go eat some mice or something? That's always fun."  Occupant: "When I said 'Let he who is without sin cast the first stone', I honestly didn't see you in the crowd, mom!"  Seltaeb: "What is the deal with Lent? I gotta give up my DS for a week? I don't think so!" "You're not funny!" *heckler turned into donkey*  Agent_Moldy: "Wait -- the DOCTOR??? It's not, 'An apple a day keeps the crucifixions away'? Damn."  Jazzsoda: *Jesus chops down cherry tree* *blames it on George Washington*  Agent_Moldy: All sumo'd up and no one to wrestle. Awwwww...  keogh: "What about the ROUSes of Christ?" "I'm pretty sure they're non-canonical."  HanoverF: *Spits out Pontius Pilate's eyeball* "Anyone else want to fuck with the Jesus?"  Seltaeb: Divinity hole  HanoverF: (Oh man oh man I'm about to meet the messiah, I hope I don't have bad breath)O0o.  Reynard: "Huh. This looks like an okay place to crash for the weekend."  Seltaeb: .oO(I hate these Jesus freaks...) Agent_Moldy: Aw man, I wish I had a shirt with a built in, mini foosball table. *kicks dirt, mopes*  Agent_Moldy: Sweet! V2! I hope they sing stvff from The Joshva Tree!  Jazzsoda: Most stories about Jesus leave out the annoying little lap dog he carried around with him everywhere. Which is a real shame, since the tiny little crucifix they used for the dog was fucking hilarious.  Seltaeb: "I forgot to give these pills to Mary, is that a problem?" Occupant: "This is my body." "It looks like a pot pie." "It's a metaphor." "You said it was your body." "Cut it out, Saint Costello!" "I'm a baaaaad boy!"  CrabofDoom: "Drink this broth; it is my sweat..." *disciples lost their appetites somewhere back among the edible toenails*  Seltaeb: The film shows it's age at the scene where Jesus organizes his pogs.  keogh: "All right, here's the garden. Paul, you'll be on the west side, keeping watch from the palms. If you see the Romans coming for me, you make a nightingale song. John, cover the gate. Judas, you're with me."  CrabofDoom: "Fuck this horse; it is my mother." "... hey, you've been high this whole time, haven't you!?" "Heh heh... duuuuude..."  JediClone: Behind the scenes of Jesus' Pepsi commercial  GuloGulo: I think we have a winner in our "ugliest jewfro" competition.  Occupant: ♪ Just take those old records off the shelf . . . Seltaeb: Wait 'til the Slinkys come down. Now that's an entrance!  Reynard: I always get stuck behind this guy too.  Generik: I'm all for diversity when casting movies, but I think making a hammerhead shark one of the apostles was a bit much.  CrabofDoom: the Last Deflation of Christ  GuloGulo: If I were Jesus, I'd be cutting a nasty fart right about now. That'd show those crucifying bastards.  Zoogicub: "Oh what a feeling!" Toyota! Occupant: "Forgive them, Father. They know not what they do!" "Hey! I'm a professional!" "Well, most of them, Dad!" Jazzsoda: "Heh, remember when Dave was hammering the nail in, & he hit his thumb & was like JESUS CHRIST & this guy was like WHAT? & Dave was like HUH? That was funny." "Could you guys take a hike? Not like I'm going anywhere." Zoogicub: ♪ FAME! I'm gonna live forever....  HanoverF: "DAD! These big jerks beat me up, and they tied me up here and put a birds nest on my head and I'm sick of this place, I just wanna come home."  HanoverF: "Jesus Christ! Put some clothes on!" Seltaeb: *points* "Ha ha!"  HanoverF: "After seeing a grizzly vision of my imminent death I've come to the only logical conclusion possible. I'm going to reduce every piece of wood within 100 miles to fucking splinters. Hold my mail." Jazzsoda: "Hey, Jesus! Hold up, I wanna axe you a question!"  Jazzsoda: "Aaaaaah!" *thunk thunk thunk* Jesus Christ, Grammar Nazi will return after these messages.  keogh: The Last Interception of Christ |
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