 E_B_A: So when Lesko was a kid, he had girly hair and a collection of chipmunk dolls? Somehow, that makes more sense than it should. |  E_the_E: Say you what you will about her, but the kid does a spot- on impersonation of George Burns. | Jazzsoda: "Transformers are kewl!" *crams chipmunk figures into her mouth, chews them up* *spits out multicolored hunk of misshapen plastic* *hits it with a hammer* "Goooo Joe!"  UnReality: And to think, just a week ago she was Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska!  Soozcat: Six feet underground, Commander McBragg has a sudden epiphany. "There! In-jea! 1872! Blast, I despise being dead."  Reynard: "Man, I feel like RAPIN' today!"  Jazzsoda: Somehow the sting of a one-night stand seemed even worse when Ronald rode away on that ridiculous old-timey bike of his as fast as he could in the morning.  Soozcat: Suddenly I don't want to know what's in the special sauce...  JediClone: Bzzzzt! thud! Sound of deep fryer starting up  Seltaeb: "Mommy! Look what I did with my phlegm!"  JediClone: Tonight on "Mysteries Of Creationism": Which came first: The Rhino Or The Egg?  E_B_A: "Kill my parents? *SOBS* I hear and obey..."  Soozcat: Taken off the market was the now very-collectible Mangloriasteinem. E_the_E: Our government does not manglor. We may torture, but we do NOT manglor.  Reynard: "SOMEBODY HELP ME! I WAS MANGLED IN A HEAVY MACHINERY ACCIDENT! OH, YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY, DO YOU! I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL YOU LITTLE FUCKS!"  Hippie: Mmm, that's good pretend coffee! I love... hey, wait! Invisible waitress! This is invisible decaff! I can't drink this! *pisses self* Well, still a grand ol' hobo Christmas all the same...  MonsterGoGo: "Am I Danny Glover?" "No, you're a hobo." "...am I now?" "You're still a hobo." "Maybe I'm just Danny Glover acting like a hobo." "Maybe you should eat your soup quietly like everyone else." "Maybe I don't wanna."  E_B_A: "I thought it was a place to get my head lice on welfare... damn facists..."  Hippie: Grampa had never tried the Sesame Street fragrance "Oscar's Own." Thanks to the fact it came in a little garbage can container, most people hadn't tried it either.  MonsterGoGo: Carter's Habitat for Humanity begins its outreach program for hobos. They each come with a weeks supply of newspaper.  Hippie: If the Hobo Placement Agency can't find a position for Dancin' Dan by Dec. 24th, it'll be a sad Christmas indeed.  Reynard: "Look, just because I'm down on my luck-" "And smelly." "-and smelly-" "And incontinent." "-and incontinent-" "And drunk." "-and drunk-" "And suffering a degenerative mental-" "Stop that! I was leadin' somewhere with this, I think..."  HanoverF: They ice down the steps every day so only the Hobo's that really want a warm place to stay make it in.  AgentQ: Ever since Sir Thurston McFungaltoes could afford a plush couch for himself, the other hoboes spent day and night debating whether or not he was still a true hobo.  HanoverF: Think? *cocks shotgun*  Reynard: Sheesh. I like the new CD from the Lone Fat Mariachi too, but...sheesh.  JediClone: "Is 'Sherpa' a name or occupation?" Page 3 "Why is there so little air up here?" Page 13 "Why did my feet fall off?" Page 117  Seltaeb: MyHoboSpace  JediClone: How many hobos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ZERO! What lightbulb! Ahahahahaha- *HOOKED*  E_the_E: "I'd love to sit down with you, kid, but my crunchy pants make it difficult."  Soozcat: "Tell us about the Depression, Grampa Hobo." "Bugrit. Bugrit. Millennium hand and shrimp." "You have the bestest stories ever!"  Jazzsoda: Ew, Delta Burke's lap looks like a couch!  Soozcat: You ain't hobo no more, man! You ain't hobo-- YOU AIN'T HOBO! YOU AIN'T HOBO, YOU AIN'T NOTHIN'!  HanoverF: That one topping? Hobo scabs  Jazzsoda: Voice echoes in memory: .oO("Well if you love your Foreman grill so much, why don't you marry it??")Oo.
"I just might... I just might."  Reynard: It just isn't a Hobo Christmas until you place the hip flask atop the tree.  Jazzsoda: "Creeeep-y, sis. Did all the photo booth pictures turn out like that?" "They DID! Who is that guy?"  Soozcat: Chateau d'Hobo, 1982. Earthy, with a hint of strawberries and urine.  JediClone: "Good bye Hobos!" "And God bless!" "We love you!" "We promise we'll forget you 'til next Christmas!" |
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