 HanoverF: A giant hallowed out Hershey bar filled with wrapped Snickers, comes with its own 240 page responsibility waiver |  william_keogh_taft: "In this series of slides, we see the wide variety of alcohols I consume to make it through one night with my shrewish wife. I apologize for not bringing the projector...I threw it at my wife." |  Reynard_K_Polk: Julie's hair was a marvelous demonstration of plate tectonics in action.  HanoverF: Too much Tetris? Heretic!  Quiet_Giant: "Jenny, I'm an optimist and my Coke bottle is half full" "Dan, I'm paraniod, and my Coke bottle is half trying to kill me!"  SelTruman: "Look honey, I know I have a tendency to overreact, and I know that's why you framed the bullet hole the last time I tried to glock you, but I'm telling you I'm a changed man!"  AgentQuincyAdams: "How dare you! I slave over a hot stove for you all day and this is how you talk to me?" "But see, you never COOK anything! You just turn the stove on and stand there for hours on end!" "You bastard."  WoodrowWilsonK: "And if you ever touch yourself, this is the kitten that will die."  AgentQuincyAdams: "How come they always get to have dessert but I never do?" "Because they were born naturally, and you were a C-section. You scarred me, Billy. Never forget that."  SelTruman: Sadly, it was soon discovered that Tommy was juicing. Capri Sun, to be specific.  Jazzald_Forda: They can't keep these geniuses off the field for twenty fucking minutes while the freshly-painted lines dry?  WoodrowWilsonK: "I can't talk now, I have to go guide a miniature airplane landing on my mom's head."  Jazzald_Forda: Sure, Ben was slow-dancing with the hottest girl in school, & what was even better, she put out! But damn if he couldn't get his mind off that punch bowl. Punch! Wow. You can't get that shit at home.  SelTruman: Jay Leno's first film wasn't widely available... *wocka chicka wocka chicka*  Reynard_T_Fox: Jay Leno's second film was even less widely available.  SelTruman: Dave's obsession got so bad, he'd tweak anything with a nub.  Reynard_K_Polk: Darla began to realize, rather late really, that "I could just drink you up with a straw" wasn't really a quirky compliment on how nice she looked.  CzolgoszK: They were like years ahead of their time for having a Bowie impersonator piss on their lawn after the wedding  GersonWilkesBooth: Tired of always being a bridesmaid, Madge pushed a piece of cake into her own face  AgentQuincyAdams: Three items to immediately remove from the area in the presence of Fall Out Boy. Really, it's better for everybody.  HanoverF: Bill considered himself a bit of a technophile, but really he just wanted to fuck the potato clock  Quiet_Giant: .o0(Over.. under... around.... awh, shit forget it... I'll just get the duct tape)  Jazzald_Forda: The film department building at the U of Wisconsin has a one-of-a-kind facade styled after a giant reel of film. If you drive by fast enough, you can watch Citizen Kane. GersonWilkesBooth: o o 0 (I wonder what I can punch today)  Reynard_K_Polk: Suddenly, Bill's Thousand Hands of Fury turn on him.  LeeHarveyK: "Lips are for squares and housewives!"  AgentQuincyAdams: Ecto-1's being driven by a ghost! IRONY |